| Jun 08, 2012 08:16 PM
hey everyone im new here. i need some advice my 27 year old husband is a bed wetter and has some day time accidents as well. this has been going on for about a year or so. been to the doctors but not much has come from that but a bunch of tests. and no conclushion. about 2 months ago i reached my braking point when i found him sleeping on the bran new couch in front of the t.v. with a big wet spot on the couch. which in turn i went out and bought him some diapers. when he got home i told him if he wanted to use the furniture or the bed he would have to wear protection. he put up a big fight for the first week or so. took me threatning to expose his secret. now he willingly wears protection. but i belive his selfesteam is shattered which is creating distince between us. what should i do?
coalboilerman6/10/2012 9:31:00 AM
I have to agree. This type of "attitude" is more common in the younger generation now than ever before. I was married one time, and it seemed as though I was only supposed to be around when she needed me, or had time in her busy life of freinds, church, work, etc. That got old really fast, and I have been back to being single and happy for several years now because of it. I treat my wife as if she is part of me. But I sure did not get that in return. I for one believe this post is real, and she really believes she has to find him help.
coalboilerman6/10/2012 9:32:00 AM
bedwetter7896/10/2012 3:56:00 PM
i really hope bigboss reads all these replies and see how shallow she is i feel sorry for her husband poor guy has to put up with that like was said in an earlier post he needs protection alright from his wife.
VikkiZ6/11/2012 1:49:00 AM
Hi Everyone, While we appreciate everyone's feedback, please remember to be respectful to members of our community who have come here seeking advice. Thank you! Vikki
dustyboy12346/11/2012 3:13:00 PM
Respect is earned. The original post did not earn any. Enough said.
mch6/11/2012 3:51:00 PM
I was diagnosed with Cauda Equina Syndrome six years ago, and although the root cause has been resolved, the condition left me bladder incontinent. I am an active professional with a family, and in order to lead a "normal" life must wear diapers to manage my loss of bladder control. I took responsibility for my physical condition, got the medical evaluation and help that I needed and took the required steps necessary to get on with life. My wife has been very understanding, has accepted my condition and what I need to do to manage it. I did everything I could and so has she...we worked together to deal with a difficult and humiliating condition. What some may interpret as heartlessness here, could also be viewed as attention-getting tough love. This husband clearly had a problem and hadn't dealt with it very effectively. Expecting that a spouse should be willing to accept a wet bed, wet pants and wet furniture may be asking too much, especially given that there are plenty of ways to deal with this. At any rate, she took the step that he wouldn't. The fact that she posted here is a posititve sign. Hopefully they can work together and seek the medical attention that he needs. Most causes of incontinence can be cured, or at least helped, so the need for diapers or other absorbent products won't be necessary. It's true, that like others who are incontinent, I have a disability of sorts. However, I don't assume that it's the responsibility of others to simply accept my condition on my terms. I am discrete and responsible, and do all that I can to help others understand what I have to deal with. Consequently, I have found that those close to me who are aware of my incontinence are supportive and considerate. I know that these circumstances can be difficult and frustrating, and I hope that this helps. Good luck!
bedwetter7896/11/2012 3:53:00 PM
I am sorry but I feel the way the post read this person humiliated, derated and forced her husband to wear a diaper and wants us to tell her how to fix their relationship. Sorry you broke it you fix it with that attitude and maybe she should have had some respect for us.
LynnK21046/20/2012 5:35:00 PM
OK, THE BIGBOSS made a mistake. But she can patch things up at home with an appology, time and a pledge of acceptace for his condition. He does have a responsability here to be part of the solution. He doesn't have to settle for diapers but tried to find the cause with no luck so far. Chances are high he may remain diaper dependent, but it doesn't have to destroy his self esteem. He can still be a whole person, just with an aide to help him.
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